Q. My mother has become more and more dependent on me and even talks to me like I am her parent, asking permission to do things like go to lunch with a friend. I don't feel comfortable with this change in our roles, but don't know how to handle it.
I know this is a hard transition for you. After all, she is the woman who tended to all your needs and you have to accept that she can't do that for you anymore. Not only that, but she is now relying on you for things she used to be able to do for herself. Here are a few tips that will help.
Try not to talk down to her. Although it might take numerous attempts to get a message through, try to talk to her on an adult level. Don't speak for her. If you are in a restaurant or the doctor's office, force yourself to let her do the talking. However, with the doctor, if you notice she is having difficulty explaining an issue help her along without taking over the conversation.